01 February 2007

Well Slap My Wobbly Thigh and Call Me Nigella

You know you’ve crossed a line when you find yourself emailing Paramount Comedy to complain about the frequency with which they’re repeating the same episode of ‘Scrubs’.

However, as sad as it is, let me explain. 7pm to me is what midnight is to Cinderella. Not because I turn into a pumpkin, well not quite anyway, more a couch potato. It’s my time to kick back and rejoice in the fact that I am no longer required to do anything I don’t want to. The cherry on top of my ‘recreation tart’ is a cuppa and ‘Scrubs’. As much as I love it, I’ve seen the one with Kelso’s Rascal three times in the space of a month and those people at Paramount need to know this waste of my precious free time is an outrage. I want compensation in the form of a nanny, a cleaner and a large cash sum to spend on clothes.

Especially after a day like today. I’d be a strong contender for ‘Housewife of the Year Award’ after cleaning for 4 hours, ironing for 1½, doing mummy stuff in between as well as fitting in an afternoon stroll with the Chick and cooking dinner. To top off my ‘no brain required’ day, I made Accountant a healthy and nutritious packed lunch complete with the addition of two chocolate penguins as a special treat.

This was not a decision I took lightly as I’m cautious of raising expectations that could potentially lead to another dull, menial chore being added to my already long list of dull, menial chores. How mothers who work manage to fit everything in, I will never know. I admire you all.

It was actually Six-Pack Simmie, a true wonder woman, who would have done all of the above by 10am and also fitted in a nine mile jog and baby swimming who inspired me after telling me she makes Cradicus a power lunch each day (as well as baking cakes as per photo). As she also fits in work as well, I felt guilty that I, a full-time housewife, was sending her man off to work each day inadequately nourished. That said, only time will tell whether this act of wifely kindness will reoccur. Note to husband: buy me chocolate daily and your chances will improve.

To my dear friends Gambogini and Jules, I’d like to say a massive congratulations. Gambogini has landed the job of her dreams and Jules has landed an embryo which is making her nauseous and a dodgy hat. Happy holidays to Clare and happy puking to Jules xxx

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