Ladies Wat Lunch ... Eventually

Ricocheting off of a car park barrier wasn’t the soothing way I had planned to ease Chickie back into consciousness. Two startled eyes stared back at me as I checked for whiplash. I hate being in trouble and, following Lauren’s “where the hell are you?” phone call, I had worked myself into a slight frenzy, which is why we skidded into the space, Dukes of Hazard styley.

Gambogini was also on board and, although slightly shaken, trotted in my wake as I power walked to our luncheon with our old colleagues, Lauren and Vicster T. Lauren, a stickler for order, co-ordinating stationery and punctuality, gave me the most raised eyebrow she could muster as I reeled off the excuse I’d been preparing and rehearsing on Gambogini since the phone call.

Under pressure to order quickly as Lauren now had to be back at her desk in forty minutes, I ordered the Padana pizza. Goat’s cheese, red onion and spinach – what was I thinking? Four hours later, my bowel was way beyond irritable. Bowels aside, it was brilliant to be reunited again.

During our years crammed into a glass cage together, we could always be seen through the non-frosted parts of the glass, cackling like witches. It usually only took a few minutes for our boss’ face to appear in the non-frosted part of her adjoining office and tell us all to shut it. We put our giant whiteboard and work time to excellent professional use when we spent the afternoon drawing our HR Angels Mural. Lauren was my morning crooning partner and chocolate buddy. Vicster, the producer of the dizziest one liners ever and, of course, Gambogini, my comedy soul mate.

Chickie is now Gambo's biggest fan as she chased him around the dining room table on all fours for half an hour on our return home. Despite her enthusiasm not extending to nappy changing, a tutorial followed regardless. One more recruit to my growing team.

Accountant returned home still attached to his new best friend. The more I see him enjoying his Valentine’s iPod, the greater my urge to string him up by the headphones. Grrrr…..Baby Animals…Grrrr…

Brother-in-Law rang me up last night to say he’s instructed his solicitor regarding his appearance as ‘Alex the Lion’ in the paper. “No one will even know it’s you, you’re wearing a mask” I ventured. “I’ve already received texts saying ‘nice picture” he replied, squishing my point somewhat.

Deciding he would calm down given time, I went out and enjoyed “Music and Lyrics” with Luce. Watching Hugh Grant prancing around with a dodgy 1980’s mullet reminded me of an old photo of Brother-in-Law that had mysteriously disappeared. Short sides tucked into a black bandana with his longer blonde timotei locks blowing down his back as he sat, moodily, astride a Harley. He really should be grateful that one didn't make it's way into the paper!